Thanksgiving was a tough day. I spent most of the day in the laundry room singing along to my iPod. I called home and talked to my family and it saddened me that I couldn’t be there. Today is my first day of Objectives with Buster Lumplin and I am just hoping to get through them as quickly as possible.
“Liz I know the EPs to all of the Objectives,” Buster confesses.
“That’s impossible. They said they are not generic,” I argue.
“They are. I have asked around. All we have to do is cog (cognition) a specific realization about each one and we can be off them in one session,” he continues.
“Bullshit dude. I’ve already been warned that Objective 2 is a nightmare and there is no way to get off in one session,” I inform him. “Let’s just knock this reading out so we can start.”
The beginning of Book 4b outlines the terms that we will be utilizing for the Objective exercises ahead of us.
Indicate means to direct attention to;point to or point out;show. Book 4b, Page 7.
Indicator means a person or thing that indicates. Book 4b, Page 7.
An indicator is a condition arising in a session (or before or after it) which indicates whether the session (case) is running well or badly. It is something one observes. There are good indicators and bad indicators. Book 4b, Page 7.
Naturally good indicators (GIs) are when a student is cheerful, upbeat, confident and is acknowledging wins. Bad indicators (BIs) include, being lethargic, dull, visibly upset or bored. Very good indicators (VGIs) are when good indicators are of a higher degree. Meaning if a student is laughing, happy or taking control of his/her life while in session.
You run each Objective until you hit the End Phenomena (EP). This means there will be signs or results that indicate the action has been successfully completed.
There are three important rules when running Objectives that each student needs to be aware of and learn:
Get the person through it.
What turns it on will turn it off.
It takes as long as it takes. (Book 4b Page 33)
We are to document what the student is doing during each Objective session. We do this on Session Report Forms. This is a printed form the student fills out concerning his/her twin that is running the Objective. We also fill out worksheets that document all of the students originations while running each Objective. We have to write down the indicators (BIs, GIS and VGIs) of the student, as well as any bites. Bites are things the student might do that do not pertain to running the exercise. Common bites include: ignoring commands, making jokes, enturbulating other people’s sessions, punching walls, flipping tables and other behaviors within this nature.
When you believe the Objective has reached an end phenomena, you hand the paperwork into the course supervisor. They send it across the street to the case supervisor. The case supervisor will review the sessions and it is up to them whether or not you will run the Objective again, or if you have reached the EP and can move on to the next Objective exercise.
Before we are allowed to actually begin running Objectives, we are forced to drill our understanding of how they are meant to be run using a doll. Are resident doll is of course, Heroin Hound. Buster and I quickly demonstrate for Makayla that we comprehend running Objectives and she allows for us to move on.
You are never allowed to begin running an Objective if the student is in BIs, is not fed or is not well rested. In fact you must ask them if they are fed and rested and document their responses before continuing. Like the rest of the program, if a word in a command is misunderstood, both you and your twin are made to clear the word using a dictionary. If this occurs, it will be included on the worksheets you fill out.
There are 22 rules to running successful Objectives. After we read through them, we are made to use a dumb ass demo kit consisting of marbles to demonstrate that we understand the rules. The rules include: not falsifying worksheets, never run an exercise past its end phenomena, never get angry with the student and so on and so forth. There is a poster on the wall of the course room to remind us of them.
“Is this making sense to you?” Buster asks.
“Dude, no. It’s fucking Narconese. Let’s just start running them and get it over with,” I suggest.
“Agreed,” he mumbles.
After we collect the session report form and worksheets we need, we begin to run Objective 1. In this exercise we are both ambulant. Meaning, we are both mobile and walking around. The commands are:
Look around here and find something that is really real to you.
Look around here and find something you wouldn’t mind communicating with.
Look around here and find something you wouldn’t mind being around. Book 4b, Page 114.
Buster is going to run me first. This means that he will be giving the commands and I will be acknowledging them.
“Look around here and find something that is really real to you,” he commands.
“That clock,” I respond.
“Good,” he acknowledges. “Look around here and find something you wouldn’t mind communicating with.”
“That Heroin Hound,” I answer.
“Good,” he acknowledges. “Look around here and find something you wouldn’t mind being around.”
“That water cooler,” I answer.
“Good,” he acknowledges.
We continue to walk around the room as he gives the commands and I point out things. My mind races with ideas about what the EP for the Objective might be. There are cubicles in the corner of the room, so I answer one of his commands with, “cubicle” so that we can go over there.
“I am ready to cog,” I say.
Buster sets the clipboard on a podium, so that he can write down my realization.
“I realize, that I am communicating with my environment,” I cog.
“That’s not the EP,” he suggests. “The EP is, I realize that I can communicate with the environment.”
“Dude, what the fuck. That’s pretty much the same thing I just said number one, and number two, this is my session. Just write down what the fuck I say,” I demand irritably.
I watch as he writes down what he thinks the EP is for the Objective.
“Dude what the fuck? Write down what I said,” I demand again.
“Just trust me on this. I got you,” he suggests.
My blood begins to boil. I hate this idiot. I can’t believe that I am paired up with this little bitch boy. Moreover, I can’t believe that he is not writing down what I have cogged.
“I am going to take the paperwork up to Makayla,” he informs me.
“She isn’t going to end our session after giving the commands for 10 minutes dude,” I say.
“You don’t know that,” he suggests, while walking away from me and up to her desk.
“Okay, Buster, remember the rules? You are not supposed to walk away from your twin while running a session. I am not even going to look at the worksheets, you have not run the Objective for anywhere near the time that you need to run it. Now go run your session,” she instructs.
I smile, as he makes his way back to me. “I told you.”
We continue to walk around the room running the Objective.
“I have another cog,” I answer.
“Okay, let me put the clipboard down,” he responds.
“I realize, that I have the ability to chose who and what I am comfortable being around and who and what I am willing to communicate with,” I cog.
I watch as he writes down my cognition. He asks me to repeat it three times. His handwriting is chicken scratch and I can barely read it.
“If you don’t write legibly, they won’t be able to determine what I have said and we will never get on to the next Objective,” I suggest.
“Who gives a fuck. Maybe if they can’t read it they will just pass us along,” he responds.
“Oh my gawd, this is hell. Are you kidding me right now? Buster, let’s please take this seriously and get it done right the first time,” I plead.
We continue to run the Objective until it is time for a bathroom break. Because we are in Objectives, we are not allowed to smoke or have caffeinated beverages during the sessions. The idea behind this is that they are mood altering substances that can causes our indicators to become fraudulent. I’ve already become hip to the fact that the students smoke in the bathrooms, so I have secured a smoke and light in my pocket.
“No smoking in the bathrooms. If you are caught smoking, that is a chit and you will be forced to attend Sunday courses. Three chits will earn you an ethics cycle and both you and your twin will be issued the ethics cycle,” Makayla instructs.
Even hearing the warning, I know damn well Buster is going to light up and I am as well. There are tiny windows in the bathroom. I light my smoke and blow it out the window. It blows back in. There are burn marks all over the wall and floor from the smokers that have used theses facilities before me.
“You guys are taking your sweet time in there,” Makayla calls out through the doors.
“When you gotta shit you gotta shit,” I hear Buster call out.
There is laughter from the other students waiting to use the bathroom. I quickly flush my smoke and make my way to the sink. The paper towel dispenser is busted and there is a roll sitting on the sink. It is wet and nasty. There is no hand soap in the dispenser. This is not a surprise to me, as we have to order our own hand soap for our personal bathrooms because they don’t supply it. It’s nasty to know how many people touch the doorknobs after not washing their hands in here. I use my the mid-drift of my shirt to turn the knob.
While each set of twins uses the bathrooms, the twins that have used them, sit on a concrete block in the sun.
“What do you think so far?” Keisha asks.
“I think this is going to be a long program,” I admit. I roll my eyes in Buster’s direction.
“The first Objective is the easiest,” Keisha laughs.
“I know. I am dreading the second one,” I admit.
“Let’s go,” Makayla instructs, as she herds us back to the course room.
I can’t wait for lunch. I miss Hayden and I can’t wait to go stare at Ryan Nicholas. I can’t shake this crush I have on him. It’s beginning to become an obsession. It is hard to focus on anyone or anything else when he is around. He is such a goof troop, but is so damn adorable. When ever I am feeling down, he makes me smile. Hayden is going to ask him if he likes me. I am nervous to hear what his response is…
Today’s Theme Song- I’m Still In Love- Sean Paul
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**DISCLAIMER: This is my personal experience at a Narconon Rehabilitation Center. This is not an expose or journalistic documentation. It is not meant to bash the program in any way, or suggest that it is the only rehab facility that works for recovery. I have been clean and sober since 09-27-13 and attribute much of that success to this program. All of the names in this series have been changed to protect the identity of my friends and sober family’s privacy! Thank you for reading!**